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June Newsletter
Author: Danyelle Lynch
For many families, summer is a welcome break from the busy pace of the school year. There are fewer early mornings, less rushing out the door, and more opportunities for fun, relaxation and family time.
As exciting as summer can be, many parents also notice changes in their child’s mood and behaviour once school is out. You may see more meltdowns, sibling arguments, irritability, boredom, or difficulty managing emotions. While it may seem surprising, these behaviours are often linked to one simple factor: a lack of routine.
Why Do Routines Matter?
During the school year, children follow a fairly predictable schedule. They know when to wake up, eat meals, attend school, play, and go to bed. This consistency provides a sense of safety and security.
When summer arrives, many of those routines disappear overnight. Days become less structured, bedtimes shift, screen time increases, and activities vary from day to day. While flexibility is one of the joys of summer, too much unpredictability can sometimes leave children feeling overwhelmed without realizing why.
Routine helps children understand what to expect, which reduces stress and allows their brains to focus on learning, socializing, and managing emotions.
The Link Between Routine and Emotional Regulation
Emotional regulation is a child’s ability to recognize, manage, and respond appropriately to their emotions. Like many skills, emotional regulation continues to develop throughout childhood.
When children are tired, hungry, overstimulated, or unsure of what to expect, it can be harder for them to manage their emotions. As a result, parents may see:
- More frequent meltdowns
- Increased frustration and irritability
- Difficulty managing disappointment
- Increased anxiety or worry
- More conflict with siblings and peers
Simple, predictable routines can help meeting children’s basic needs and create a sense of stability, making it easier for them to cope with big feelings when they arise.
Why Behaviour May Change During the Summer
Behaviour is often a child’s way of communicating that something isn’t quite working for them. Without the structure of school, children may experience:
Boredom – While boredom can sometimes spark creativity, long periods without activities or direction can lead to frustration, conflict, and attention-seeking behaviours.
Increased Screen Time – Screens can be a valuable tool, but excessive use may contribute to difficulties with emotional regulation, transitions, sleep, and frustration tolerance.
Changes in Sleep – Later bedtimes and sleeping in can be fun occasionally, but inconsistent sleep can affect a child’s mood, energy, and ability to manage emotions.
Less Predictability – When daily expectations vary from one day to the next, children may struggle to understand boundaries and responsibilities, leading to increased conflict and power struggles.
A Few Ideas to Consider
Every family is different and there is no perfect summer schedule. The goal isn’t to create a rigid routine but rather to provide enough structure to help children feel secure while still enjoying the freedom that summer offers.
You might consider:
- Keeping sleep and wake times relatively consistent.
- Having regular meal and snack times throughout the day.
- Making time for outdoor play or physical activity.
- Setting clear expectations around screen time.
- Including simple household responsibilities.
- Creating opportunities for family connection, whether through meals, games, walks or other shared activities.
Even a few predictable parts of the day can make a meaningful difference.
In Summary
Summer doesn’t need to be perfectly planned to be successful. In fact, some of the best summer memories come from spontaneous adventures, relaxed afternoons and unstructured play.
At the same time, children often benefit from having a few consistent routines they can count on. These routines help them feel safe, supported and better able to manage their emotions throughout the day.
By finding a balance between flexibility and structure, families can create a summer that feels both enjoyable and manageable. A summer where children can grow, connect and thrive while making the most of the season.
Written by Christianne MacNeil
Our roles as parents are ever-changing. Being a parent can feel like a slow, complex, letting go. The effort, awareness, and selflessness that this requires is something we tend not to discuss while we are celebrating graduations and preparing ourselves and our children for what comes next.
Graduation is a time filled with excitement, uncertainty, and a wide range of mixed emotions. As children graduate high school and get ready to move on to the next phases in their lives, as parents, we are also moving on to the next phase of our own. We are sending them out into the adult world, hoping we’ve equipped them with sound decision-making skills and the ability to choose amidst all the temptations and pressures. We want reassurance that we’ve prepared them. It is normal to feel excitement, pride, and joy as well as a deep sense of loss, sadness, anxiety, or even regret.
Parenting is this amazing gift that keeps on giving
The eighteen years spent raising children are profoundly significant, full of discovery, disappointments, and triumphs. Children grow and change and as parents and caregivers we grow right alongside them. Every time we think we’ve got this parenting thing figured out and find our groove, a new phase begins, forcing us to grow and adapt. We’re training on the job and just when we level up to being an expert that part of the job is over. The experience can feel remarkably similar to being unexpectedly let go from the most rewarding position you’ve ever held.
Purpose is a journey, not a destination
Parenting is a journey and our purpose is ever-evolving. You used to remind your child to put on a jacket before going out to play, but now your teenager is rolling their eyes at you. It’s hard to let go of the habits of parenting; it really does fly by. You may be asking yourself: how can I comfortably change with the times? What is my purpose now that I’m no longer needed in the same way as a parent? And how can I show up meaningfully in our relationship? When you’ve been working so hard toward one thing for so many years and it appears you have reached the goal, what do you do next?
You still have a mentoring role to play
From an attachment lens, even adult children still need supportive others in their lives for growth and continued adaptation. The parenting relationship changes in some ways and stays the same in others. Your role as a parent is changing but not done. Older children still need help fine tuning their problem solving skills and need parents as guides that can lead them to find the right answers for them, while embracing the inevitable mistakes that they make. Parenting is about providing the best space possible and then moving out of the way and letting them be their authentic selves. Work toward creating a dynamic in which your child feels supported and heard with room to feel independent.
As you settle into this new mentoring role, consider these steps to help you navigate your own well-being during this transition.
Allow yourself to feel – Sitting with our emotions provides the space we may need to grieve the end of one life chapter and move on and get excited for the next. Preparing and allowing yourself to feel the emotions actually reduces the likelihood of experiencing an emotional crisis.
Take small steps – Big changes are less overwhelming when we break them into small manageable short-term goals. Set small steps while you navigate this new phase of your life.
Stay connected – Make an effort to keep in touch with people in your social circle. We all need a good community around us. Stay connected to friends, family and your child as you navigate this transition. Some ways to stay involved in your child’s life during this transition are to establish regular times for phone calls and visits.
Practice self-compassion – Treat yourself with gentleness and care as you move through this period of change. Self-compassion is most effective when we meet ourselves with kindness during our most challenging times.
Seek support when needed – If you are feeling overwhelmed or struggling with the transition, therapy can help you find clarity, process your feelings, and build resilience for the future. A therapist can provide you with a safe, non-judgmental space to explore your thoughts and feelings as you navigate this phase in your life. Contact us and we will get you set up with a clinician that is the right fit for you.
Categories
April Newsletter
Written by Jalissa Jensen and Reanne Checora
The frost has thawed, the days are getting longer, the trees are budding and we are all feeling the excitement of new beginnings. Soaking in the fresh air and spending more time outdoors is a great way to boost your mental health. Nature is a natural antidepressant that can fill your soul with positivity, clarity and perspective. Today we are going to discuss the psychological benefits of getting your hands in the dirt and creating life and nutrition from seeds.
There is increasing evidence that gardening provides substantial human health benefits including improved mental health through reduced anxiety and depression, as well as physical health benefits and a boost in cardiovascular health from sunlight exposure. Gardening also offers social benefits and a higher sense of life satisfaction and quality of life.
But how exactly does gardening have so many benefits for your health and well-being?
Gardening has been linked with an increase of dopamine (associated with rewards, pleasure, and motivation) and a decrease in cortisol (the stress hormone). This means that the act of gardening can reduce stress, anxiety, depression, anger, sadness, and symptoms of anxiety and depression. Gardening also, through this increase in dopamine and reduction in cortisol, can make you happier, more satisfied with your life, and focus better. A great deal of these effects come from harvesting and consuming fresh food and spending time outside in the fresh air and sunshine. It is also a therapeutic activity in that you can lose yourself in the activity and end up accidentally practicing mindfulness!
On the more physical side of things, gardening can also help improve your physical health, as well as your mental health. Gardening often requires physical activities like digging, lifting, bending, and carrying heavy things which is a great way to get your hour of physical activity in for the day. All this exercise and time outside is associated with lower blood pressure and lower heart rate, which is especially useful for those with high-pressure jobs.
Speaking of heart health- because gardening is often done outside, people who garden spend more time in the sunshine, which means they get more vitamin D which is shown to help improve cardiovascular health. Time spent outside also helps improve immune responses and deeper breathing- meaning that you feel better for longer.
If the physical and mental health benefits are not convincing enough for you to take up gardening as a hobby, there are also significant social benefits to gardening. If you decide to take part in a community garden, this can be a great way for you to foster social connections, build a strong social network and get a great sense of community that you are close to and can rely on. Having a group of people to spend time with while gardening can create strong social ties and help you feel more like you belong to a community. If there are no community gardens nearby, then you can always join online gardening groups to meet other gardeners to swap information, get tips and tricks, and share things that you harvest from your garden.
Need more convincing?
Gardening and growing your own food is a great way to cut down on grocery bills by growing your own fruits and vegetables. And because these fruits and vegetables are literally grown in your backyard, you can guarantee that they are grown cleanly, safely, and they are fresher than you can find in a store. Fresher foods tend to have better nutritional value which can make you feel better in your body, alongside the added feeling of pride and accomplishment of growing your own food.
This spring, why not consider taking advantage of the warmer weather and find time to spend outside? You can start small with a flower bed or dig right in with a full vegetable garden- either way, the research shows that getting your hands dirty while gardening is fun, satisfying, and a great way to support your physical and mental health.
